content/articles/home-office.md: improve wording

1 files changed, 27 insertions, 20 deletions

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@@ -80,13 +80,14 @@ pics:
 ---
 ## Introduction
 
-My home office has been a [pile of boxes and old computers](#coda "pile of crap")
-since we moved to this house a few years ago.  Over the last month, we
-spent nights and weekends unpacking boxes, organizing components,
-[recycling][] old equipment, and assembling new furniture.
+We never set up my home office; it has been [an unusable pile of boxes
+and old computers][coda] since we moved to this house a few years ago.
+We finally started working on my home office this month.  We spent spare
+nights and weekends over several weeks unpacking boxes, organizing or
+[recycling][] old stuff, and assembling new furniture.
 
-The result: I now have an office with comfortable seating and plenty of
-space for projects.
+The result: I now have a home office which is suitable for work and has
+plenty of space for projects.
 
 ## Desk
 
@@ -137,9 +138,12 @@ Shown in picture:
 
 [{{< pe-figure "chair" >}}][chair-full]
 
-Rather than a desk and office chair, my preferred computing environment
-is a comfortable seat and a coffee table with enough space for a couple
-of laptops, some miscellaneous gadgets, and a beverage.
+I do not like sitting in an office chair at a desk.  Instead, I prefer
+sitting in a comfy chair in front of a table that has enough room for
+a couple of laptops, some gadgets, and a beverage.
+
+We organized this corner of the office so it feels like a mini living
+room.
 
 Shown in picture:
 
@@ -181,8 +185,9 @@ after pies:
 
 [{{< pe-figure "shelves" >}}][shelves-full]
 
-Storage shelves.  The boxes in the closet still need to be unpacked and
-sorted through.
+This section of the room has shelves for storage.  Everything is
+organized into transparent bins which are clearly labeled. The boxes in
+the closet still need to be unpacked and sorted through.
 
 Shown in picture:
 
@@ -195,10 +200,9 @@ Shown in picture:
 
 ## Coda
 
-This section has a couple of pictures which don't fit in the sections
-above.
+Here are some pictures which did't fit in the sections above.
 
-First, here is what my office looked like before our improvements:
+This is how my office looked at the beginning of the month:
 
 [{{< pe-figure "before" >}}][before]
 
@@ -207,14 +211,15 @@ Most of the computers in the back corner were junk and have been
 
 [{{< pe-figure "duron" >}}][duron]
 
-On a more positive note...
+On a more positive note.
 
 I am using a [case][vilros-case] with passive and active cooling for
-`pumpkin` (the [Pi 5][pi5] on the desk).  The entire case serves as a
-passive [heat sink][]: internal metal strips and a thermal pad draw heat
-from the CPU, and the heat is dissipated by air channels on top of the
-case.  The case does have a fan, but (at least for my workload) it only
-spins up for a few seconds at boot.  
+`pumpkin` (the [Pi 5][pi5] on the desk).  The case is a passive [heat
+sink][heat sink]: it has metal strips and a thermal pad on the inside
+which draw heat from the CPU, and the heat is dissipated by air channels
+on top of the case.  The case does have a fan, but it is not active
+during normal use (at least for my workload); it only spins up for a few
+seconds at boot.
 
 Anyway, I think the case looks pretty slick:
 
@@ -304,3 +309,5 @@ Anyway, I think the case looks pretty slick:
   "Passive CPU heat exchanger."
 [vilros-case]: https://vilros.com/products/vilros-aluminum-alloy-passive-and-active-cooling-cooling-raspberry-pi-5-case-cnc-crafted
   "Vilros Duo Deluxe Raspberry Pi 5 Case"
+[coda]: #coda
+  "pile of crap"